7 WEEKS

As I was emailing Corey this morning I realized his release day is 7 weeks as of today. The thought as it passed through my brain actually made my heart stop a beat, seriously! That we are finally looking at the proverbial ‘door’, is still hard to wrap my mind around. One ajusts to many things, most things, as we all did in our way, to this prison journey. That doesn’t mean it was ever easy, ever felt ‘normal’….it has been none of those things, and my heart still breaks at the years my son has lost to this encarceration-crazed nation. But I won’t dwell on that, because I am too happy to just be 7 weeks to release, 7 weeks and my son will be back in the ‘real’ world.

As I emailed him this morning I also reflected on how Corey and I email each other so often … a few times a day, just keeping tabs on how our days are playing out. It’s a lifeline of sorts, just keeping the windows of our worlds open to each other. Not that his days aren’t full, he has good friends, a job that he must go to for a few hours every day, he reads voraciously, and he must attend ‘after care’ sessions in Re the RDAP program he graduated from. But we do email more now than we ever have. Until just the past few months it was generally once a day, but now its more like 3 times. Morning, afternoon and just before bed I’ll shoot him another one off so he has one to read with his coffee first thing in the morning, after he makes it over to the trailor that houses the computers. Unlike me, who can get up, grab my coffee and just sit down on the couch or my desk and log on, inmates at Lompoc must leave their housing unit and cross the yard to the trailor I just mentioned, in order to log on. Don't get me wrong, we are all most grateful for the service, and he'd happily walk a mile or more to use it if he had to! It, like most all things in prison, is just not as convenient as we have things on the outs. The inmates are only allowed to use the computers for email, internet is not an option, and at that are limited to a 30 minute session. He's learned to type fast to get the emails off to those he keeps in touch with! He can leave after his 30 are up however, and return a few hours later for another session, etc. The email is provided by a independent contractor called Corrlinks. Anyone wishing to email someone in prison where Corrlinks is available to the Prison (some prisons use other contractors, other systems, such as JPay, which Taft utilized) must apply or be sent an invitation by the inmate, and then be approved by the prison facility. All emails are of course read/screened prior to delivery to the inmate as are his, prior to being sent out to others. Generally after I send off an email to Corey it will take 2 to 3 hrs before he receives it. Ditto for when he emails me.

For the first 6 yrs of his encarceration the prison at Taft did not offer any email service. Every day I would write Corey at least one letter, and walk it down to the local post office. It was important to me when mail was called every day Corey would receive something...magazines, a book, letters, pictures, printouts of interesting articles from the web, catalogs even …. anything to keep his mind occupied, to detract if even for just a short while, the boredom and everyday-sameness of his prison existence. Even with daily emails I still make time to mail him something several times a week, again, because it adds something positive to his day. For anyone with a loved one in prison I cannot stress enough how getting something in the mail can brighten an inmates day. A card or letter, just a simple postcard, you cannot imagine how this brightens their day. Knowing someone, somewhere, has thought of them, letting them know they are not forgotten. Because all too often the imprisoned become the forgotten ones, as the years pass and their life as they knew it fades into the distance, and along with it friends and family who must move forward with their own lives. Corey, and Rod and I, are so very grateful for those few friends and family who have remained in his life all these years, you have no idea how blessed we have felt from your simple acts of kindness.

Well today in his email Corey stated he finds himself walking the track more, his usual once a day has turned into 2 and 3 times a day, just basking in the knowledge of his impending release, daydreaming about all the things we wants to do, will soon be able to do, once back home …being back in the city, exploring all the new developments and businesses, being able to stop and order food in a restaurant, walk into a movie theatre, cook in his own kitchen, watch whatever program he wants on his own tv, go to bed when he’s tired, not when the lights go out, and wake up when he’s rested, not when the guard turns on the bright glaring lights, and not surrounded by 150 men crowded into the housing unit he shares with them. Corey’s not allowed himself to daydream all these years, when thoughts of home would come he’d push them from his mind, it was too difficult to handle at times, the yearning that would come, the impatience to have this imprisonment end.

7 weeks and when I turn out my light tonite, 7 weeks minus one day :).